"Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor."
– Truman Capote
"Just Look Where I'v Come From"
A moment of pure honesty: I DID NOT want to post pictures—I don’t even like taking them. But, I realized that if I was going to be true to this work God has led me to, they were necessary so people could actually see the benefits of hard work, discipline and ceaseless prayer. I realized I needed pictures so I could see myself, so I could see the work I need to do and the progress I make. I was terrified to post pictures because then everyone could see me, and how big I was. I would look at my face all day because I think I’m cute as a button, but once I got past my chest, I didn’t want to see anything. Then I realized, “Silly girl, everyone sees you anyway!” But my fear is gone because I know these pictures will change, just as I have changed.
At my highest weight a little over a year ago, I weighed 378 pounds—that’s the size of a baby elephant! Today, I weigh 336 pounds. It’s been hard, and I’ve fluctuated, but what I know is, my success depends on me. When I lose weight, it’s because I’ve made good choices for my health. I’ve been diligent in exercising, making good food choices and always being prayerful. If I don’t get up and go to the gym, it’s not Darlene’s or my trainer’s fault—it’s mine. If I am not eating right, it’s not because people are stuffing cakes and Big Macs down my throat—it’s because I’ve chosen to eat them. If my spirit is not right, it’s not because God had abandoned me, it’s because I’ve been ignoring Him. So, all of this, all of my success depends on the choices that I make, and this is where everyone can gauge if I am making good choices or not---especially me.
September 24, 2012
October 1, 2012